feels so weird without him. i guess i should have just asked for space, but i was angry. and damn well right that i was angry... but all i needed was some space. how fool to portray that as some sexual vision of my future. that wasn't it at all. not even a little bit. i haven't changed in that sense at all. ahhh well, i hope wherever he - you - seth is. he's okay.

as for me... i'm onto the 3rd tales of the city book. carol is getting done sept 1. that hit me really hard. that's my boss folks... and i'll miss her horribly. it makes my future decisions even more difficult. kevin and i are dying our hair tonight. he says it's supposed to make me feel better... we shall see.