watched finding nemo tonight. enjoyed it. the house is empty now. kevin is out with jason and seth is (you guessed it) in the room with the door closed. i know he needs the space. and i feel so unfullfilled. i mess with my own mind in these matters, and end up thinking i'm playing silly love games. i do want him to be with me when he wants to be with me... but i don't think he ever wants to be with me..... i'm sure he must, at times. like, when i'm being funny. happy. upbeat. playing the game. i'm not optimistic this evening, and i'm not feeling good. love bites.