i am going through it. nothing really new there. 2:27am local time. i have these fantastic new marlboros. they're the same price as other marlboro's but SMALLER!!!!!!! with a slightly different colored box.. INGENIOUS!!!!!!!!!!!!! those bastard smoking companies. i'm such a sucker. but seriously, they're super cute.

i'm tying to find my student loans. i'm trying to figure if i should stay another year and arizona, and just get my shit together? i'm thinking how i'm going to over come the fact that i'm a jealous freak in my realtionship. i'm trying to figure out why none of my friends have ever told me this. all just sort of agreeing that the bastard is probably cheating on me.

i've decided he's not.

we went up mt. lemon in the new car, that i believe seth has named nevermore... aruggg. it was beautiful up there... we went about 4.5 thousand feet, but had to turn around because there was a mud slide and the road was closed. all the beauty of course disapated when we got into a funky little screaming match and i demanded he pull over the car because i thought he was going to kill us.... i got out started walking. he started crying, we got back in, came home did my taxes ate, and then fought some more.....

arugggggggggg....

okay, so we're going to fight. fight better.

i'm off to find out where the hell my delinquent student loans are, so i can fix them.