Convos and Muppets... EEEK!!

so, okay...

i am at work last night. serving tables. playing the witty happy anything-you-want guy, who seems to be my alter ego, when....

it was table 17. maybe to entertain myself, or maybe because i'm onto something.... it seems some nights that certain tables in the restaurant get this odd energy... as in, last night table 17 was the hot table. anything and everything memorable about the night happened there. and this was by no means, an exception....

3 girls. average looking women. fun to wait on. they were certaintly flirting with me, and waiting tables can be flirtatious anyway... so i was playing along and we all were having fun....

and then they leave. firstly, the tip was nice. thanks girls! but secondly....

they leave this um, pamphlet on the table that on the front reads....

"LENDING A HELPING HAND: Have You Ever Wondered what it would feel like to be a Muppet?"

so, of course, i gave it an odd look, and then took it out back to have a cigarette with it and read it before i got sat again....

and what, to my fragile little eyes should i read about, but.... FISTING.... this is a pamphlet complete about the joys of fisting.....

for those of you... Fisting is... when someone puts their hand up your booty... i mean, all of it.

it's not my thing... and honestly, i didn't expect to find a pamphlet sitting on table 17 in the MIDDLE OF THE DESERT ie NOWHERE..... waiting for me on the subject. that image we all have about the desert being tranquill... peacefull, and beautiful even.... YEAH, my ass.......... (my ass just asked to be left wayy out of this.. sorry, ass.)

so, i read the pamphlet, and had a giggle... and let myself be shocked enough by this just to be entertained... and then i went back inside....

and sure enough... there they are, waiting for me.

the girls from table 17 are STILL there. *panic* what do i say to them? "hey guys, thanks for the pamphlet... good stuff there!"

apparently my face said it all, and one of the girls puts her hand on my shoulder and says, it's okay... that's how everyone reacts at first. it's normal. she then procedes to tell me that there is; don't even kid people... a BENIFIT!!!!! happening next friday night, and she is going to be the bottom (which means, she's gonna um... get the fist...) in front of about 45-50 people she said) and i was invited.

all i had to do was wear a black open shirt (that's the requirement... black top with chest exposed...) and bring a refreshment.... the bottom girl was bringing deviled eggs (whatttt!!!!???)

so, i said ...thank you, how sweet....

and promptly made a - any - excuse to become amazingly busy until they finally waved goodnight and left....

so - this blog could've read:

i got this really nice invitation to go to a party next friday. i get to wear a costume and bring guacamoli. isn't that neat!!

but, that really wouldn't be what happened, would it be?

anyway, so i'm really busy next friday. i'm not gonna be able to make it. HOW SCARY!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

am i a prude?

or............ is that really scary LOL =))))))))))))))))))))))) alrite, time to go back for more. work beckons. have a lovely day people.