"I CAN BE AN ASSHOLE OF THE GRANDEST KIND..."
as if to show that time does move on, with or without you. that our selves have nothing to do with the passing of time or the intentions or choices of those around us which are tied to us.
it seems as though we've no other option but to try to make rent, and to find acceptable and working outlets for our expressions of all sides of the spectrum of emotions we are feeling and for the things we are going through.
in celebration of this, here is me emoting:
"ACT OF GOD"
(written by myself)
Sitting alone
Imagining pictures on the wall
like an addict
But I am not an addict at all
Acceptance
That nobody will understand
Like I am old
But I am not yet an old man…
Little by little
I watch as you fade
Little by little
It feels more like it’s me who goes away….
It’s going to be a long time
It’s going to be a long way
And I’ll have to be strong
I will have to have faith…
It’s going to take an act of god
To bring me back to me
for it to be what It needs to be
first up…
I am going to have to believe…
Gonna have to believe…
Blinds down
No light gets inside
Like I am blind
But there is nothing wrong with my eyes…
And inch by inch
I back up to the door
Inch by inch
i know this place and I don’t want to know it anymore…
(chorus)
Like I’ve lost my freedom
I throw myself around
Tears wont come, resolutions don’t
Peace is only a distant sound…
Echoing from everyone else
As I fight to get out of my own hell
And you who I thought could help and understand…
Has made me learn to never ask for help again…
And it’s going to be a long time
It’s going to be a long way…
It’s going to be a long time
Why won’t it go away
And I’ll have to be strong
I will have to have faith…
It’s going to take an act of god
To bring me back to me
for it to be what It needs to be
first up…
I am going to have to believe…
How do you believe you can believe
How do you believe?
END © ARRFBC September 20, 2008
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