try to keep the balance up... between love and money....
i was, i guess, i was in highschool. going through a tough time for whatever reason. my mom drove me to my elementary school parking lot. turned up the radio to this song called "x's and o's" which, for all the songs we've shared, will always remind me of my mom most... and we parked the car with the music blaring and played basketball in the middle of the night. why? because i told her nobody had ever taught me how to play. that, my dear readers, is what life is made of.
that's how you fix someone. that's how you love someone, and ensure that you are loved... you must try. you must act.
...i no longer think i'm a house wife. i'm in a relationship, and i live with that person. i'm home more often then he (i like to think because i'm wiser... i work a job that pays more for less hours...), but i'm not a house wife.
i planted a tree today. i suppose technically, i re-located the tree. i re-planted the tree... planted it; close enough.... i don't believe i ever have.
and today, i did.
and that's a moment i'll share with myself. because i tried. it seems like no big deal i'm sure. and i also, have rolled my eyes at the things i do with my yard. but... it's a part of me i believe in.
i'm a believer in green psychology. ...i suppose it could be a bit pagan? ...but i call it the green world. it's watching myself grow through the plants around me. it's giving to them, as they give to me... it's a concentration, and a learning to watch something else. plant really isn't going to entertain me all that much, so it i who has to give IT love. um... i'll explain more later.
my license will be fully paid off tomorrow. on the last day of september. just like i said. and that, makes me happy.
until then... i drink wine and think of everything that is different, and how i am still so fully here. simply only, getting brave enough to try a little bit more.
be well.
i was, i guess, i was in highschool. going through a tough time for whatever reason. my mom drove me to my elementary school parking lot. turned up the radio to this song called "x's and o's" which, for all the songs we've shared, will always remind me of my mom most... and we parked the car with the music blaring and played basketball in the middle of the night. why? because i told her nobody had ever taught me how to play. that, my dear readers, is what life is made of.
that's how you fix someone. that's how you love someone, and ensure that you are loved... you must try. you must act.
...i no longer think i'm a house wife. i'm in a relationship, and i live with that person. i'm home more often then he (i like to think because i'm wiser... i work a job that pays more for less hours...), but i'm not a house wife.
i planted a tree today. i suppose technically, i re-located the tree. i re-planted the tree... planted it; close enough.... i don't believe i ever have.
and today, i did.
and that's a moment i'll share with myself. because i tried. it seems like no big deal i'm sure. and i also, have rolled my eyes at the things i do with my yard. but... it's a part of me i believe in.
i'm a believer in green psychology. ...i suppose it could be a bit pagan? ...but i call it the green world. it's watching myself grow through the plants around me. it's giving to them, as they give to me... it's a concentration, and a learning to watch something else. plant really isn't going to entertain me all that much, so it i who has to give IT love. um... i'll explain more later.
my license will be fully paid off tomorrow. on the last day of september. just like i said. and that, makes me happy.
until then... i drink wine and think of everything that is different, and how i am still so fully here. simply only, getting brave enough to try a little bit more.
be well.
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