oye me goodies.... i got sooo intoxicated last night.

i think it was a bit long over do... i head spins going on litterally when i went to sleep.

i had cool convo's with jon and paul online last night. paul keeps begging me to go to the casino with him. haven't yet, but definetly gonna give it a shot.

i decided i may be looking for a friend. that's human, right? nothing wrong with that. i creep myself out lots of times, but it's best to just know me, and go with it.

bloging is a bit dangerous. it's like living your life on the real world or sompin. the wrong person tunes in and sees the show, and you're busted for life.

kevin's "A&F boy" read his page... where in kevin says "I BAGGED AN A&F BOY YAY!!!!!" the problem here, is that the clothes do not always make the man. not every a&f boy out there wants to go to your silly website and see themselves degraded to that! this, i promise you.

ahh, but that's not all kevin said about the boy on his site, and in the end... he was kevin about it, and if the boy can't handle it... then now's just the never.

paul is devistated still over his break up... it's been a couple months. he says it feels like he's dying. i talked to him about how in this one life, we live many. something is ending there, but onto the next life... as we get older it's sooo easy to get our feet stuck in purgatory. the grey space. and think that that is, actually, the next life. i hope he's ok.

jon wants a boyfriend. is activily searching for one (poor guy). said he'd let me or seth hook him up on a blind date. he trusts us. god, it's hard to set your friends up on blind dates. where do i find the creep that i think is going to be good enough for jon.

i mean after all, i COULD blame eric for this whole relationship i am in, couldn't i? =)))) HAHA!

bobby. bobby. my brother is in big fat trouble. you can even type his name into google search.com and 3 articles from the bangor daily news come up. aruggg


kevin and kate are becomming phone sex operators tonight!!!!!!!! WTF!!!!!!!!! i don't even know what to say about that.

is there any body normal out there? evidently normal has been shot down. and replaced with, "real life" or something of that sort.

i love my people with all of my heart, please do not get me wrong.

i'm going to run away with rob thomas. we'll have babies, and everything will be just fine.

ooof. i haven't updated in a while. my webpage is under construction. www.geocities.com/fumble95/FUMBLE. it has a mad sheik new look on the start page.

all seems to be well. some new songs for ya comming soon to the page. i can't stop writing lately. i'm going to go out to kennedy lake park tomorrow and write some more, before i change my website too drastically.

here's one. it's called "circles." been waking up wide eyed at night trying to remember people i haven't talked to in a while. trying to kick my lignering inertia, i suppose. this one is about people who were bright stars in your life that have faded away to shadows.

"CIRCLES"

dark eyes
wild child
haven't seen you in a while
i had thought
you and i
could withstand these trials

but lives change greatly to give room to a little more
still... it's not surprising we hadn't met before
we travel in different circles
we did then, we do still
and we always will...

today's thought:
where've you been?
it's been a long long time, my friend
life's strange
but good...
i learn things i never thought i would...

and lives give way to offer just a little bit more
it's not surprising i hadn't thought like this before
we learn in different circles
we did then, we do still...
and we always will...

you've got my vote
hey kid, knock em dead...
and all the the other things
i never said...

lives give way to reviel a little more
and i hadn't thought about you, like this before
but we think in different circles...
we did then, we do still...
and we always will...

we travel in different circles
we did then, we do still...
and we always will...
END (C) 3.25.04 ARRFBC

all is well. bobby, i love you man. take care of yourself.

easter was yesterday. we had a ham, and a huge dinner with seths mom. i worked sunday day shift... made good money. we went out for a drive later, and saw a whole heard/pack/gaggle of javalina. they're cute. much cleaner than i'd expected, and i have high doubts that they EVER surrounded and tried to attack that woman on the news.

it's like when you get excited, and people say they're scared because you're too loud, or something and you're just staring at them going "what? are you THAT boring?"

we traveled quite a bit this weekend. seth and her went to california, and mexico, etc. i caught up with them to see the grand canyon (fantastic!), sedona (my favorite!) and the navajo land... the 3 mesas... upstate arizona. it's beautiful up there.. not very desert. rather chilly. had a wonderful trip!

i love collecting all of these places. it's definetly worth something.

i got an mp3 player this weekend!!! finally. i went down to target and bought it for myself.

everything is going well, and it's nice to see myself in good spirits.

cheers!

well....

today is seth's 29th bday. i know it's making him feel weird. god, almost 30. wows!

his mom has been staying with us (that feels so strange to say...) for 2 days now. currently they are off to california for the greater part of the weekend. yay!! freedom! relaxation!!!!!!

i'm working all weekend, so not much for relaxation there. uh, she's cool. i like her. i've been hanging out with her for the last couple of days while seth has been at work. she's cool. different then what i had thought.

so... vodka drink in hand... i journey into the night, not sure what this evening will bring, however i think it'll be me and the cat. seth made it out like i'd go out and whoop it up with the boys (who are the boys?)...

but here i am. vodka drink in hand... can't be that bad.

it's been raining crazy since wednesday in tucson. the santa cruz actually has water in it!!! it's fascinating!

i'm out...